Chapter 6: What is Love? On the topic of romantic love, marriage, children, and what Love really is.
Chapter 7: Detachment vs Attachment
Chapter 8: Self-confidence
Chapter 9: Novitiation
I intend to write on this four subject, but before 4 comprehensive posts, here's a preview draft of what I want to say. (If I don't push myself with some drafts, who knows when I'll find time to pluck these out from my thoughts)
Chapter 6: What is Love? On the topic of romantic love, marriage, children, and what Love really is.
Preview:
Apparent reality: I love you.
Actual reality: I love you so that you could satisfy me, excite me, pleasure me, and make me happy.
I love myself.
If asked for the definition of love, I would have said, "Love is the unconditional compassion that expects nothing, and knows no bounds.
It's unfortunate that many of us do not realise nor do we analyse deep enough on how common society has convoluted, misled and deceitfully use Love for self serving purpose.
If what you really meant was I love you because you can satisfy and pleasure me. Admit to it. It doesn't absolve you of selfishness, but at least you were honest.
You'll earn -1 Selfishness +1 Realization +1 Honesty.
Don't sugar coat it to become the pure and sacred I Love You - holding yourself up high for your ability to "Love".
Do rethink the next time you use the word "I Love You."
Will continue this onto my views on marriage, children next time.
I love children (wait till you see me in captain wildchild mood with my cousin), but...?
We ought to do some deep thinking.
Ps: In case you'd concluded, I am not a cynic of love. :)
But, love in the pure & real form would become increasingly rare if we kept lowering our bar/standard of what it entails.
I, for one, would not submit myself to a degradation of what Love is.
Chapter 7: Detachment vs Attachment
You get better in your job or whatever you do being detached than attached.
Chapter 8: Self-confidence
You become more confident by dissolving the ego, not building up the ego.
Convincing yourself that "I'm such a good speaker etc etc." does not work. In reality, you become more nervous because all your attention was on your"self", your ego.
I once advised my bro that "all you have to do is to shift your attention from yourself to those you wish to help, impact, or communicate to."
Chapter 9: Novitiation
So I've thought of novitiation when I hit the 50-60s (assuming I do live that long), retired, and could contribute little to the society due to physical impediments. That's a good time to focus on developing myself mentally. I think what really entices me is:
1. To put wordly pleasures & desires away - I'm somewhat up for such challenge (you know how in games we have Level 1,2,3 etc, getting stuck on personal pleasures & desires forever feels very level 1, getting stuck on level 1 feels very unadvancing, not growing to me; let me reach for the stars & greater heights ;)). I want to challenge the common assumption that greed and selfishness is part of human nature. I'll be an experiment :)
2. To be able to explore to the depths of my mind & deplore the nature of all things.
Let me go back, to delve into the depth and nature of my mind, all things, the universe. :D
3. To be able to do that with undeviating and unwavering focus.
Unfortunate is the many stereotype of monastics (btw, monks really mean bhikkhu/beggars for buddhist). But at least, laid there is a sustainable way of living where I'll have real time to have fun with my mind. Actually, I meant serious business. Just that I normally put things in a more positive tone than how I actually think about it like "I'll have real time to have fun with my mind.. & difficulty taming it too"
4. To be able to challenge myself to uphold good discipline/training.
5. To be able to give back to the community. Bhikkhus are really required to beg from the community that they're serving, in return provide help, advice, guidance, service to the community.
6. All the problems in society (made up by individuals), are only collective manifestation of individuals problems/greed, selfishness, lack of compassion & wisdom towards others. Can these really be solved without every individual turning on a critical eye on every of their body, speech, action (which stems from your mind)? Without a foundation, one will be drown in face of all these adversities in society. If a foundation needs to be build, what's the best way to do it? Socially Engaged Buddhism (ala Thich Nhat Hanh Zen style)? Monastic style (ala Theravadian)? Humanistic Buddhism (ala Tzu Chi)?
That is what I am exploring.
For this, I've came up with a plan: 10 days novitiate programme starting Nov 25. To experiment and advance these intellectual discourse/preconceived ideals I've had about novitiation when I'm 50-60s to actual experience that'll bestow insights.
To or not to?
Biggest obstacle: Whether or not depends on how well I can convinced my parents. Uh oo. This may just turn my world upside down.
Not that they hadn't already sarcastically remarked things like "I'm half a saint - I don't need to eat". (I'm sry, mommy daddy, I don't agree with you but I still love you :) ) Oh well, things doesn't happen according to your wish in life. Life's tough. "But I am tougher," I once told them :)
This is when I wished I live in Thailand, Myanmar, or Vietnam - where parents are proud of novitiating children and actively send them to novitiating camps every school holiday.
But nah, it has became too institutionalized and formalized.
Organized religion is always bad.
I couldn't even agree with calling myself a Buddhist.
The term implies that its a religion with some dogmas, I'm a follower, and I'm supposed to have unquestioning faith.
Yet, accepting these three implications will actually make you less of a Buddhist.
No one needs that label - Buddhist, Buddhism (we already stress too much on forms; see Socrates on:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theory_of_Forms). Buddhism certainly does not; it does not even need to be accredited. For who should - things like truth, gravity, and the like - be accredited to?
Let go off your insecurities or wants for comforting communities. There's no need to defend truth for truth will defend itself.
Buddha said 'Buddhism' will start, grown, eventually die off - just like everything else. Impermenance. But every end is only a new beginning; just as in a circle, there's no starting or ending point. Universe ends and it begins, a person who realised the truth by oneself & are able to teach & influence are called a 'Buddha/Awakened', but enlightened persons are not one but many; anyone can realise too for truth does not belong to the Buddhas or anyone.
Chapter 7: Detachment vs Attachment
Chapter 8: Self-confidence
Chapter 9: Novitiation
I intend to write on this four subject, but before 4 comprehensive posts, here's a preview draft of what I want to say. (If I don't push myself with some drafts, who knows when I'll find time to pluck these out from my thoughts)
Chapter 6: What is Love? On the topic of romantic love, marriage, children, and what Love really is.
Preview:
Apparent reality: I love you.
Actual reality: I love you so that you could satisfy me, excite me, pleasure me, and make me happy.
I love myself.
If asked for the definition of love, I would have said, "Love is the unconditional compassion that expects nothing, and knows no bounds.
It's unfortunate that many of us do not realise nor do we analyse deep enough on how common society has convoluted, misled and deceitfully use Love for self serving purpose.
If what you really meant was I love you because you can satisfy and pleasure me. Admit to it. It doesn't absolve you of selfishness, but at least you were honest.
You'll earn -1 Selfishness +1 Realization +1 Honesty.
Don't sugar coat it to become the pure and sacred I Love You - holding yourself up high for your ability to "Love".
Do rethink the next time you use the word "I Love You."
Will continue this onto my views on marriage, children next time.
I love children (wait till you see me in captain wildchild mood with my cousin), but...?
We ought to do some deep thinking.
Ps: In case you'd concluded, I am not a cynic of love. :)
But, love in the pure & real form would become increasingly rare if we kept lowering our bar/standard of what it entails.
I, for one, would not submit myself to a degradation of what Love is.
Chapter 7: Detachment vs Attachment
You get better in your job or whatever you do being detached than attached.
Chapter 8: Self-confidence
You become more confident by dissolving the ego, not building up the ego.
Convincing yourself that "I'm such a good speaker etc etc." does not work. In reality, you become more nervous because all your attention was on your"self", your ego.
I once advised my bro that "all you have to do is to shift your attention from yourself to those you wish to help, impact, or communicate to."
Chapter 9: Novitiation
So I've thought of novitiation when I hit the 50-60s (assuming I do live that long), retired, and could contribute little to the society due to physical impediments. That's a good time to focus on developing myself mentally. I think what really entices me is:
1. To put wordly pleasures & desires away - I'm somewhat up for such challenge (you know how in games we have Level 1,2,3 etc, getting stuck on personal pleasures & desires forever feels very level 1, getting stuck on level 1 feels very unadvancing, not growing to me; let me reach for the stars & greater heights ;)). I want to challenge the common assumption that greed and selfishness is part of human nature. I'll be an experiment :)
2. To be able to explore to the depths of my mind & deplore the nature of all things.
Let me go back, to delve into the depth and nature of my mind, all things, the universe. :D
3. To be able to do that with undeviating and unwavering focus.
Unfortunate is the many stereotype of monastics (btw, monks really mean bhikkhu/beggars for buddhist). But at least, laid there is a sustainable way of living where I'll have real time to have fun with my mind. Actually, I meant serious business. Just that I normally put things in a more positive tone than how I actually think about it like "I'll have real time to have fun with my mind.. & difficulty taming it too"
4. To be able to challenge myself to uphold good discipline/training.
5. To be able to give back to the community. Bhikkhus are really required to beg from the community that they're serving, in return provide help, advice, guidance, service to the community.
6. All the problems in society (made up by individuals), are only collective manifestation of individuals problems/greed, selfishness, lack of compassion & wisdom towards others. Can these really be solved without every individual turning on a critical eye on every of their body, speech, action (which stems from your mind)? Without a foundation, one will be drown in face of all these adversities in society. If a foundation needs to be build, what's the best way to do it? Socially Engaged Buddhism (ala Thich Nhat Hanh Zen style)? Monastic style (ala Theravadian)? Humanistic Buddhism (ala Tzu Chi)?
That is what I am exploring.
For this, I've came up with a plan: 10 days novitiate programme starting Nov 25. To experiment and advance these intellectual discourse/preconceived ideals I've had about novitiation when I'm 50-60s to actual experience that'll bestow insights.
To or not to?
Biggest obstacle: Whether or not depends on how well I can convinced my parents. Uh oo. This may just turn my world upside down.
Not that they hadn't already sarcastically remarked things like "I'm half a saint - I don't need to eat". (I'm sry, mommy daddy, I don't agree with you but I still love you :) ) Oh well, things doesn't happen according to your wish in life. Life's tough. "But I am tougher," I once told them :)
This is when I wished I live in Thailand, Myanmar, or Vietnam - where parents are proud of novitiating children and actively send them to novitiating camps every school holiday.
But nah, it has became too institutionalized and formalized.
Organized religion is always bad.
I couldn't even agree with calling myself a Buddhist.
The term implies that its a religion with some dogmas, I'm a follower, and I'm supposed to have unquestioning faith.
Yet, accepting these three implications will actually make you less of a Buddhist.
No one needs that label - Buddhist, Buddhism (we already stress too much on forms; see Socrates on:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theory_of_Forms). Buddhism certainly does not; it does not even need to be accredited. For who should - things like truth, gravity, and the like - be accredited to?
Let go off your insecurities or wants for comforting communities. There's no need to defend truth for truth will defend itself.
Buddha said 'Buddhism' will start, grown, eventually die off - just like everything else. Impermenance. But every end is only a new beginning; just as in a circle, there's no starting or ending point. Universe ends and it begins, a person who realised the truth by oneself & are able to teach & influence are called a 'Buddha/Awakened', but enlightened persons are not one but many; anyone can realise too for truth does not belong to the Buddhas or anyone.
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